I see you out there working your butt off trying to make a difference in the world around you. You probably have a full-time job in addition to your passion-project, and there’s a good chance you are a parent, too. Not to mention the extracurricular activities you’ve got on the go. I see you.
I see the hard work you put in on a daily basis and I see you as you race across town to make a parent teacher meeting or get the groceries done before your next appointment. I scroll through social media and see how you’re inspiring others and lifting your followers up. I see all of this and wonder what you’re feeling on the inside.
I wonder if you’re losing hair due to the stress of feeling alone as you try to keep your life organized. I wonder if you ever take the scenic route home so you can have a few extra minutes to yourself. I wonder if you doubt every decision you make and sometimes question if what internet trolls say about you is true.
I know you’re setting goals and pushing through the rain and the pain to reach them, because you are driven and motivated and people look up to you. You might even lie awake at night thinking about the people you’ve had to lose from your life because they don’t understand why you keep pushing forward the way you do.
You’ve seen more struggle and heartache than most and you know what rejection and failure taste like. You know what hard work means and you understand that success doesn’t happen overnight. I see you using the time in the elevator to cross one more task off your list which is never-ending.
I know you’ve read dozens of books and attended workshops to better yourself. I’d even bet that you have a personal mantra or affirmation you repeat quietly under your breath when you’re stuck in traffic. You’ve grown, and some people might even accuse you of having changed. You’ve accepted that because you’re growing and changing right now as you read this.
You are someone who gets shit done. You are someone who motivates the world around you just by being you. You understand that to create change you must be the change and you revel in it. You love the taste of a setback because you comeback even stronger and that’s a goal worth pursuing in itself.
You are someone who gets shit done and not everyone understands that. We both know that is what sets you apart. You are not like everyone else and that’s an amazing gift to give the world.
As many of you know, I’ve been through a lot of changes over the last 12 months and life is looking very different these days. I’ve received love and support from surprising sources and I’ve received judgment, too. The judgment I wasn’t as prepared for and it got me thinking about my opinions of others and myself and even of the industry I’ve chosen to work in.
As usual, I’ve picked up books on the topic and listened to countless podcast episodes on the subject and I’ve been working hard to check my judgments. I quickly realized I had to check myself or I’d wreck myself (and limit my personal and business growth). I’ve been fortunate enough to have a couple of extraordinary athletes in my network who have been challenging my preconceived ideas about their specific sports, and about the pursuit of athletic success in general.
Don’t Fight It
During my time as a human kinetics student, I was exposed to the world of sport psychology and mindset training by Terry Orlick which was quickly followed by my own first-hand experience with head injuries (long story short: I took a hockey puck to the head and suffered a concussion). Since then I have been a sometimes vocal advocate for safety in sports and 99.9% of the time I would advise another human being to avoid being punched in the head. I always wondered what ran through the mind of a fighter Until I started conversing with an amateur MMA athlete, Cory Vern.
My knee-jerk reaction was to ask him “Why the hell would you take a beating on purpose?” and to assume he grew up an aggressive and angry young man who spent all day punching things. I feel like an idiot for rushing to judge Cory based on my fears surrounding his sport: he’s revealed himself to be a thoughtful and rather sweet, dedicated dad of two who lets me pick his brain at all hours of the day and night (because I often wake up with good questions and ideas and can’t let them go). I’ve learned that fighting for him is like running for me: a peaceful quiet where you feel at your best with the world around you. Turns out he’s a pretty dedicated runner himself: as in it’s nothing for him to run 15k to save himself a cab ride.
Finding that we shared something in common as important to me as running, opened the door to discussing the importance of mindset and being able to focus on the goals you set for yourself. Focusing on nutrition and different fighting styles and bouncing back from a tough workout will sound familiar to any athlete, regardless of activity. I’m headed to Moncton, NB next weekend to see him in action and pick his brain on the fight night mindset needed to succeed (because he’s gonna win his match ). Cory The Warrior and I aren’t all that different, really, which made me wonder what else I was judging.
And The Wheels Keep Spinning
Recently, I commented on the Instagram post of a local athlete I had been following since I saw him race before my half-marathon in October last year. I had no idea of this guy’s story, I just knew he was paralyzed and raced a wheelchair like he stole it. We started chatting about protein pancake mixes and racing, and it ended up with him recording an interview the next day for the podcast I co-host with Melissa Kahn. (Seriously, do yourself a favour and listen to it now. Well, after you finish reading this post.)
Ben Brown was in an ATV accident 12 years ago that left him paralyzed from the chest down, but that only slowed him down. Temporarily. Within weeks of his injury, he had decided to do whatever it takes to get back out there on wheels. I thought I had a developed a pretty positive outlook and followed a strong goal-oriented path, but Ben continues to shake my perception of a positive outlook.
Insert Face Palm Here
Aside from realizing how inaccessible so much of our world is, I’ve been challenged to reflect on how ignorant I’ve been. I felt like an idiot after asking how ripped his abs must be (duh…I studied anatomy and physiology and no feeling from the chest down means no ab function. Sorry, Dr. Stothart.) I even asked if he lived alone, because I assumed he was unable to do everything himself. I completely made an ass of myself, but once we got that out of the way, I learned that a paraplegic athlete has different nutritional requirements and even the climate affects him differently. Everyday is #armday for this elite racer, and while those guns may intimidate some newbies at the gym, his dedication to clean eating and honest nutrition only increases my guilt about those Tostitos I ate earlier.
While there are so many differences between his racing path and my own, there are far more similarities. We each bore our family and friends with our talk of distances and interval times and training schedules. Our closets are full of more athletic wear than business wear, and we #fitnessmotivation on the regular. He finds it tricky to get groceries between work and school and training and I find it hard to train between getting groceries and teaching school. I’m just a woman trying to reach her goals and he’s just a man pushing towards his.
As a fitpreneur, it’s important to challenge the way you think about the sports and athletes outside of your niche. We’re all just pushing our limits, just in a different ring or race course.
I want to thank Cory and Ben for continuing to teach me. With each new podcast guest or person I meet at an event or race, I find myself learning something new and expanding my horizons as a runner and as a human being. Every sport has something to teach us and every athlete even more so.
“Never decide the outcome of a race at any point during the race…just keep going”.
Triathlete, Kathryn MacKinnon, hit me hard with this quote during a Queen Pins Halifax fundraising event I attended last Thursday. I keep repeating it to myself and coming back to how important it is because this rings so true for all aspects of life. I’m a runner and have known all too well the temptation to slow down or take a break or give in to the little voice that says it’s ok to not do your best today.
Throughout my encounters with depression and anxiety, I learned to coach myself and remind myself to put one foot in front of the other and to just keep going. After losing a baby to a missed miscarriage, when the world felt dark and I felt betrayed by my own body, with a family counting on me to show up for life everyday, and all I could do to cope was to just keep going one step at a time.
That’s what I did. I kept going. I didn’t know how I was going to finish in my 21.2k race and I didn’t know if I’d get through the darkness or if I’d have a healthy pregnancy again. But I finished and I made it through another pregnancy. I’m making it through and isn’t that what all of us are really doing?
So, here’s the secret in case you haven’t already figured it out:
just keep going.
Yup. That’s it. That’s all there is to it. Isn’t that how any of us accomplish anything? We set a goal, make a plan, and just keep going. Nothing groundbreaking about it. As adults, as parents, as athletes, as entrepreneurs: we are figuring things out one day at a time, but we just keep going.
I recorded a teaser episode of Run For Your Life with Melissa Kahn last night, and we decided I was the tech savvy half of the duo so I needed to figure out how to upload our episode and create an RSS feed and get it submitted to iTunes. Ummmmm wtf do I know about this stuff? Nothing!
Well…I knew nothing last night but here I am 12 hours later doing my happy dance (picture something cross between a jig and a shimmy) because after a helpful video link posted by a fellow queen pin entrepreneur and following the twists and turns of online support I FIGURED IT OUT!!!! I just kept going. I didn’t know if I’d have to hire a student to figure it out or if we’d have to pay for some service to straighten it out, but I didn’t let that potential outcome stop me from taking one step then another then another.
I always keep going. I think it’s all I know how to do, honestly.
During my half marathon I actually told myself to just keep going. Hell, I even got a tattoo of mountains to constantly remind myself to keep climbing. I had to stop to pee around the 5k mark of that race and I could have decided to abandon my goal time but I looked at my tattoo, talked to myself a little, and put one foot in front of the other. I did what we all do: I just kept going.
I don’t know exactly where my business is going to end up and I’m excited about the possibilities that allows for. I don’t know where my running career will go, but I know that I’m going to keep running and that’s all that matters. I don’t know what’s coming next but I’m confident I can handle it because look at everything I’ve done so far! Everyday I get up and show up.
Today happens to be Women’s Entrepreneurship Day, and my message applies to all entrepreneurs regardless of gender, but I need to shout out to my boss babes to just keep going. Some of you are mothers and wives and that stuff is hard. Some of you are working a full-time job in addition to your business and that’s not easy. All of you are busting your butts to make your dreams a reality and that’s some magical sh*t right there.